Isaiah 54:4 ESV “Fear not, for you will not be ashamed; be not confounded, for you will not be disgraced; for you will forget the shame of your youth, and the reproach of your widowhood you will remember no more.”
Shame is a tricky thing. Where does it come from exactly?
When you make a mistake and people tease you…where does the shame come from?
When you are beat out by someone who is better than you at something and you feel shame, where does that come from?
Think about it for a moment….you are on the playground and make a mistake in a game you are playing and some kid decides to come over and point at you, egg you on and make you feel stupid. That kid clearly has something going on in their life that is making them feel “less than” or inferior and so they are taking it out on you, trying to bring attention to you so that they will be able to take the attention off of the bad feelings they have about themselves for a short time. The teasing has absolutely nothing to do with you and yet you may carry the shame of that situation for many years.
It is not what the other kid says or does that brings the shame. It is the fact that you believe them over what I say about you that causes you to feel ashamed.
Now, I ask you, from this perspective, what is it about that kid that causes you to give them that type of authority over you? Do you respect that kid and think they know something valuable. Is that kid the wisest kid in the class and you look up to them and wish you were more like them?
Chances are the answer to those questions are “no”. Instead, that is the kid that people tend to not like, tend to not want to be friends with, and tend to try to avoid unless they need to stay close to them in order to avoid being teased by them.
But the truth of the situation is that you made a mistake of some sort. Chances are you were doing something new or different or playing around and, when you are learning something, you always make mistakes and learn from them. It is natural. The only thing that brought shame was that you believed what that kid said about you.
If we turn it around and see the truth of the situation, what changes.
That kid does not know anything about you. Chances are they are very insecure because they do not know who I say they are and they are making a bad choice. You don’t want to be like that kid and you certainly do not look up to that kid with respect. You can see now that they were broken and damaged and that is why they tried to tear you down rather than build you up.
Now, look at what I say about you…you were out on the playground trying something new. You might have been outside of your comfort zone or you may have simply made a small mistake and fallen down. I look at you, check you out to see if you are okay or if you need any healing, I have a friend come over and help you up and then I say something encouraging like “great job trying something new – you will get it next time…try again” or “unfortunate turn of events right there but you are My wonderful child and I love you and so all you need to do is dust yourself off and try again. I will never love you any less because you make a mistake or fall down.”
The shame disappears completely when you put emphasis on who I am and what I say to you so…
We will go into this in more detail over the next few days but for right now know this…
When you feel shame, you are most likely looking to what you think other people think of you rather than to what I say about you.
You have a choice to make. You can believe what they say recognizing they are human beings and prone to making mistakes, being broken and sinning, or you can believe what I say about you recognizing I am God, I am perfect and I know everything about you. Who do you want to believe?
Matthew 11:28 NLT “Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.”
Take a moment and consider the things in your life that cause you shame. You have been carrying this burden for a really long time. Come to Jesus with it and let it go.
Come to Me, Jesus or the Holy Spirit – whoever you are most comfortable with – and ask what I say about you. Notice your self talk around that situation. Notice who is putting you to shame. If it is a person saying shameful things about you, notice who that person is, whether they may be broken or hurting and that is where their words come from within themselves. Notice if you are judging yourself harshly or thinking poorly of yourself because you wish I had created you differently than I did.
Then, take a moment to hand all of this to Me and to take on the words that I speak over you. Words like:
“I love you so much I would die for you” (John 3:16).
“I am here with you and I am mighty and will save you. You give Me such gladness and I will love you no matter what. I sing over you every single day because I am so proud of you.” Zephaniah 3:17
“I made you in My image” Genesis 1:26
Do those sound like words that bring shame?
No?
Let My words supersede what you or others think of you and you will no longer feel shame!
I believe this is a message to us from God, written from His perspective – Sherri
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